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Self Esteem: You need to Build That or Rebuild That Yourself

Self Esteem; You need to Build That or Rebuild it for Yourself

How do we gain self esteem? We measure our worth as children when our parents are pleased with what we do and praise or reward us. Our teachers praise and reward us. Our sports teams praise and reward us. Our affiliations praise and reward us with approval. Is that what self esteem is? Outside approval? We are not needy children any more but we still reference our strengths on our rewards, awards, degrees and certifications. Is this all we are and stop at after we obtain these? Can we fill the need of an empty pit of self identification by the gathering of these documents. It is an achievement and what do you do next? Do you work for a company of acclaimed and esteemed majority ratings or for yourself. Fear keeps us from believing we can learn to be self-sufficient and learn along the way to be working as an entrepreneur but not everyone is made to be one. We do have strengths and dreams but to an extent can we fulfill and gain financial peace and abundance if we are missing management, training, learning to delegate or ask for help and keep that up? We sometimes think if we give up some of our ideas to fulfill; we will sacrifice the whole dream. That’s not so; learning to trust and learning again to have faith that we all are a team on this earth plane. We are meant to help each other in whatever capacity possible and allow the creative process to continue.

If we are harshly criticized and told as a child; you can do better even when we have worked hard…that’s an incentive but what about the progress of growth to praise along the way. No one wants to hear one sided information and output. We must be fair and balanced and we teach our children self empowerment when we do this. We teach them that if they did the best they did and even if they do not succeed; we measure if it is exterior, is it something to adjust in the way we present the dream, is it something to allow others to do different roles we cannot fill to make this dream happen. Are we flexible in the time frame of the dream and location? Location and timing are everything. If we present too soon by not studying the obvious setbacks and alter the approach; then we are missing the point. We are we and that means you and me and your neighbor. We get along, we communicate and understand, we work together and no one is an island. Sometimes, if we are constantly told we didn’t do enough; we will never accept ourselves or love ourselves and the people we love; we can harshly criticize like the child of your past. Well, not everyone is a child and it doesn’t apply to you being in the now. Try not to bring the past unresolved harmony created by your ancestors back into the play and enforce that method thinking it was right and make you more determined…How about a little kindness and praise and love. That needs to be in the equation to resolve and feel accomplished. Otherwise, we will have dissatisfied beings never appreciating the progress forward and just being worker bees and workaholics to match a dead ancestors whose methods no longer apply to you and you can change your own behavior to say I can do better but I have done so much so far and I learned and I can change to make my dreams successful and am I being realistic. If you can’t just tell yourself before spending huge amounts of time and money on the project outweighs the reality of working with others to see if they have the talent and ability and the timeframe to train or learn. It is valuable to be able to see beyond a commitment to a dream that may not be divine timing or feasible with what we envisioned as the end result. If you keep seeing the end result to inspire; you can forget the nitty gritty details of learning something and process and the quality of processing and taking that time is the best flow and ease you can create. Yes, your methods maybe unrealistic but break down the steps…When you see the sudden burst of creativity matches the environment and tried and true response; you know whether you can succeed or not. Allow others to take roles you are not good at to fill that need of the role but discern their capabilities. If they are not capable then move onto the next person. Ask yourself are you not seeing the transformation in the steps towards your dreams or are you just wanting to arrive at any means pressing yourself to please an invisible ghost who said you can do better and trying to beat the clock ticking in your imagination. Take time to be gentle, acknowledge whether it is feasible or adjust the way and see if it will take a few different tries. Don’t try to meet the same technique with the same chaos behind just a means to get to the end result. Enjoy the journey, growth, flexibility and growth towards your dreams which are just not for this place or community but gladly needed and studied if needed elsewhere as well.

You have to be a realist in the end with a constantly cerebral and creative mind. Not everything needs a grand entrance or big bag result to enjoy your life making dreams of your happen matching the time period and reality and given information you’ve gotten on other dreams you have had. If you have had many…you need to meditate and figure out which ones are worth your time and are you motivated to please the ghost being perfect? Everything you say doesn’t have to have a major announcement and deadline. Try to be satisfied with small things and see if you are motivated by not being satisfied with yourself by a ghost who made you feel unworthy or unrelentingly dissatisfied which you may become. You will know you are under this ghostly direction when you are never happy or satisfied or love yourself and you use ‘dreams’ to avoid the inevitable realization. These ghosts are dead and you deserve to love and create at your own pace. Be kind and honest about this and then you can be happy just creating. You don’t have to be a rockstar, popular…all of us are stardust already and we will leave and years will pass and we will not be remembered. As time flows, we flow into one dimension from life and death and rebirth over and over again. You will know at times children are blamed to cause a problem that their parents scapegoated incorrectly. It was not your fault in maintaining family, money management, etc. When we constantly tell our kids that…we create a pattern of people pleasing as well and always jumping in immediately to resolve everybody’s problem…You have to grant them space to think and resolve and ask for help and it always won’t require you. You are not the Lone Ranger or Superhero for everyone because of your childhood experiences being told you were the blame of their problems…realize this and tell yourself…this is B.S. and stop it before you keep volunteering and allow others to ask or others to do the work.  Just be happy, paced and love yourself. You don’t need busyness to feed your need to be loved. You need to love you first and then create a flow that doesn’t keep harping in your mind the ghost of dissatisfaction patterns from your ancestors in your. Bless those memories, laugh and rethink the patterns you have adapted from them are outdated if we can never be satisfied or love ourselves. Be in love, sit in love, meditate in love and you are already loved. Namaste and peace to you.


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